Lucky you, if you are! It’s tax time. My desk and tables have been piled high with files, receipts , ledgers and documents, an ever-present reminder of a time certain deadline. Meanwhile, my inbox is stuffed with many unopened, unread ezines and newsletters . I haven’t blogged in about two months. My Facebook and LinkedIn pages need to be updated. All important and It all needs to get done, but other priorities arise, sometimes at the most inconvenient times. Like managing care issues.
A few weeks ago, I received a call that my 90 year-old mother with Alzheimer’s had fallen and broke her hip. They rushed her to the hospital and performed a hip replacement. Less than 24 hours after her release she was back in the hospital with complications, extremely weak, and not eating. With her health failing, it was clear my priorities needed to shift from business to the business of managing her care.
Mom resides in a nursing home outside of Chicago, and although my sister lives close by, this was a time for sisters being together. With the doctor and staff ‘s assessment, we made the decision to place her in hospice care. A week later she fell again. A few days later, more phone calls about continuing care issues. Her care took precedence over all the things that I could not get done because her comfort and our desire to do whatever we could to make her as comfortable as possible, became a top priority.
In between care calls, business conferences, presentations, and all the details of daily multi-tasking, it’s a constant juggling act of redefining priorities. I can delegate to a degree but some things still remain my responsibility. With much to do and a desire to do even more, I struggle with not being able to do everything I need or want to do either by necessity or by choice. It’s a continuing lesson of sorting out real priorities and doing first what must be done. Letting go of expectations of what I should be able to accomplish often within self-imposed timeframes coincides with the process. Since I like to move forward boldly in the direction of my desires, it’s sometimes a very hard lesson. Patience is obviously another lesson being cultivated, as I can’t hurry up the process of dealing with “what is.”
Last night I handed off tax documents and a bulging box of records to my accountant. Postponing all that number crunching had hung over my head for a long time while tending to more important life issues.
This morning I received a call from a friend who’s now dealing with her 83 year-old mother’s declining health compounded with dementia. She knows I’ve walked the path. Although I had many things on my to-do list, I knew my highest priority right then was to simply listen and offer support. Uplifting a troubled heart might be the most important thing we can do at anytime, in spite of all the other priorities that yank us in all directions.
I'm not keeping up with it all, but I am usually very much in tune with what is the most valuable use of my time and energy. When all those other things I didn’t get done are swirling around in my head at the end of the day, I’m realize that simply being there for someone else is probably the best use of time.
My inbox is always overflowing. I don’t post blogs as often as I’d like, or do everything I know needs to get done. It’s all about getting more comfortable in having to let go of our own expectations at times and the frustration of not being able to get it all done. This is coupled with letting things be as they are while taking steps to move toward your goals at a more realistic pace. Above all, well-being is enhanced by living in alignment with your highest values on top though the moments of each day. That's being the best you can be for yourself and for others. S.S.
posted by Sandy at 12:57 PM